5/4/2022 0 Comments Why Live?I have given up on ever feeling as if I'm part of a community. I genuinely feel like I'm an alien upon this earth. I find myself unable to relate to others. I don't understand emotions. I don't care about the interests every one has, mine are too different. My political beliefs put me at odds with the queer community. My religious beliefs put me at odds with the queer community. Being queer puts me at odds with Christians. I don't know how to socialize or be someone others want to be around, and no one has the time to put up with me as I try to learn how. Even my own family doesn't like talking to me because I'm so bad at it. I'm too much of a coward to kill myself. I want to die though. I always wanted to be dead by age 25 and to be honest, that desire has only increased over the years. I mean, it's not like I'm physically healthy either. My body is so broken down that it's getting hard to be mobile, and my cognitive functions aren't there anymore. What's the point in living? I want death, the sweet release of death more than anything. I can't hold down friendships. I can't even get a single fucking job. I feel alienated and isolated. I live with my parents (who abused me growing up and are still kinda transphobic among other quite problematic things) because I have no other choice. I want death. I have no more will to live. Things never get better, only worse. That's the only consistent thing in my life. Things only get worse. What's the point in living?
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AuthorHi! I'm Anna, a currently transitioning transgender woman! I started my blog "Ramblings of a Trans Woman" as therapy for gender and identity issues and abuse from my parents and church. Hopefully, someone else out there can get something from this. If you want to talk, just get in contact with me, there's plenty of ways how and we'll discuss the best way to talk! Archives
June 2022
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